Kris LeDonne 0:38

Hi friends. I'm so blessed and thankful to have had this beautiful conversation with Dawn Maynor and to be able to share it with you today. There's two things that really stand out that's special about this episode. First of all, Dawn and I, shared a guided meditation before the part of the conversation you'll get to hear. And it was so beautiful, because it put us both in such a happy and calm state in order to let this conversation flow. And the other thing is how reminiscing together helped us bring out life lessons that we have gained and that we long to share with others for the sake of Raising the tide for all boats. So I think you're going to really love it. But first here is a quick message from our sponsor.

1:28

If you're looking for a trusted service that can transform tons of printed and digital pictures into something that's space conscious, beautiful, and displayed on your walls or in a legacy album on your lap, then look no further. Reminiscence by Kris LeDonne is here to serve you and your loved ones. Now you can continue to make and capture beautiful photo memories, enjoy sharing them with ease, and make new memories in the process of reminiscing You can find inspiration and a contact form at krisledonne.Com or just check the show notes for a link. Now back to the show.

Kris LeDonne 2:01

Dawn, can you talk to me a little bit about how you first started listening to your intuition? I remember when I first started really being true to myself, there was another couple that My husband was really fond of the husband and I really wasn't feeling the wife. It's like, there's just something like every time I'm in the presence, I like go in this lock up and I just want to run. I'm kind of right about it. And I, I finally, I just had to stay in my place of like, no, like. I, I know I have an inner knowing the saying, every time I'm around, I just want to run as fast as I can. This is a sign from my intuition saying, you know, put a boundary there and he finally honored it. And we moved on, but that, and then later things happen that I was like, there's my confirmation. See what happened. So that helped me going forward in a time he may question, he may feel good about something versus like, If I'm if I'm questioning it, then I'm okay. But if I have a strong, like frozen and I want to run, that's no, we're, we're, we're out of here. Like that flight response. Yeah. Okay. And then once you start really practicing with your body and noticing sensations in your body through breath, work, yoga, Reiki, um, Okay. It'll start to become more for sure for you, you know, um, it's like you pick up on things and you don't question it anymore because you know, for sure, like now I know, and later on it confirms for you. There are times where. I'll be in a crowd and I feel something weird on my back and nobody's touching me. And I don't know if that's a warning or if that's just an awareness. The next time it happens, what if you just stop and ask, what is this? What is the first thing that comes up? That's what it is. Okay. All right. So those exercises are hard for me because you got to get out of your head for that. And I'm always like the. But are we sure that's the right answer? Kind of student, you know, that is some major programming. Well, what you should do is like write it down and then start to notice, like you can question it, but have it ready available. Like, no, this was it. This was it, you know, or decide even like not questioning it. And you'll just start to see a whole new world open up for you. Any tips on stopping the second guessing? Just decide. Okay. It's an intention. Yeah. It's an intention. Maybe that's a trust thing. Maybe it's a trust of my intuition, you know, while uncovering it. It's also like old, um, belief system that's unfolding, you know, that there's so many things we grew up with that really acknowledge that, but they just seem cliche, like trust your gut. You know, or women's intuition and those are the phrases I grew up with, but they never really had meaning. Like they were not phrases that I recognize as actually being given value. Like it would be a way of, of a mother just trying to silence somebody questioning them and just a women's intuition, you know? But I never really understood. Is that just a, a shut up phrase, you know, stop questioning, or is that really like intuition? So that's something I never grew up really considering. Yeah. What about when you were pregnant, like, did you know on each kid, whether boy, girl, do you have that inner knowing? And then you were right. I may have had it and just not recognized it. My husband was so insistent that he just wanted girls. Oh, well, he got it. Oh yeah. Times two. Actually. He said a girl and I was like, yeah, but she needs a sibling, you know, and we have the space and you know, we have the, the health, the wellness, the awareness and, um, yeah. I, I want, I want Annie to have a sibling and he's like, okay, but it better be another girl. I'm like, why are you talking to me as if it's up to me? And me, I was like, okay, we're going to find out because if it is a boy, I already have a name and I need to warn my husband. But I, I think if he wasn't so insistent on what he wanted that I probably would have just waited and listen to maybe some of those voices that always speak. It's just a matter of are we listening? Yeah. Yeah. What about you? Oh, yeah. So, um. When I found out I was pregnant with Kenan, I mean, it was weird. I'm like a whole body, just like boy. And I was like, I just, it's a boy. I knew it is like, it's like I feel boy. Yeah. And so it was. And then, um, with Brooklyn, it wasn't instant, but one morning I was asleep and I woke up to the sound of birds singing and my whole life. That would annoy me and make me so mad that birds woke me up when I was trying to sleep. And I'm laying there and I'm like, that is the most beautiful sound. Like, Oh my gosh. And I sit up and I was like, Oh, it's a girl. Like I'm having a girl. Oh, that's so cute. Brooklyn was singing to you. Three birds. That's so cute. Oh my gosh, but, but you were already a mom by then. Yeah. So then with, and then with Kendall, I knew right away too, and there were so many confirmations with her. So I had a friend, I had this dream where I saw, um, these clouds come in, they formed a heart and they formed the number five. And I woke up, I was like, what was that? Because my whole life I'd only dreamed about people and, and, and I dream in color. I don't dream, some people dream in black or white. So it was really. Wow. Weirded out. I don't know. Like, what was this? So I messaged a lady that had been kind of sharing these kinds of things with me at yoga. It's like, Hey, listen to this dream I had. And she said, no, that I'm coming from the kindest place in my heart, but could you be pregnant? Brooklyn was stillborn and she was like, I feel like Brooklyn may be trying to make her way back to you. And it's like, she's crazy. Like, no, I'm not pregnant. And then I found out that I was, and like, I need to go back to that message. So when I messaged her, I was two weeks pregnant because when I found out I was six weeks pregnant. And then I'm like, Oh my gosh, like, what if this is a girl? Um, and so what was backtracking? So the heart and the five, what I learned now is she was practicing learning like mediumship skills. So the heart is love and the five is five senses. So that was Kendall sending me like a sign that she was coming or Brooklyn, whatever this is, right? I'm getting chills and chills. Yeah. Brian was leaving to go out of town the day we found out on a guy's hiking trip. When they come out of the mountains, there was a fortune teller there and one of the guys had had some drinks and he's like, I'm going to get everybody their fortune read. And so when Brian goes and has his turn, he sits down and the lady's like, I'm sensing a little girl around you. Do you have a little girl? And he's like, no, I did, but she's passed away. And she was like, she's trying to make her way back to you. Everyone's like, what? My wife is pregnant. And she thinks it's a girl. Oh, it was. Yeah. That's amazing. I remember having a knowing with my sister when my sister was on the way. I was little, I was, um, five and a half when she was born. And, um, I remember visiting her in the hospital and they hadn't named her yet. I was so annoyed. What do you mean she didn't have a name yet? Because I knew all along I was going to have a sister. That was, I guess that was my knowing. That was my most obvious knowing because children, you know, they less wiring, you know, as far as society goes, right? I knew I was having a sister. I don't remember any discussion about my parents knowing it was a girl or not. I should ask them. I know sometimes they don't remember these details as vividly as I do, because, you know, some, some memories like we attach to more than others, but, um, I remember me saying, what is her name? And they're like, what do you think her name should be? And I said, and then They never said anything. And then she comes home from the hospital. I'm like, what is my sister's name? And they're like, well, Amy Lynn, of course. I'm like, oh, okay. So I named my sister, but it wasn't even anything that like I decided it was just like a knowing. And knowing that that was her name. So maybe my sister chose her name and made me aware. Thankfully, my sister didn't get her name that I was mad at my parents about. Wait, what? That sounds like a story. I wanted her name to be Tippy Toes. I had this little baby doll that pushed a stroller on its tippy toes. And I wanted that to be her name so bad. And then I can still visualize it was four years old. My grandparents were there taking care of us. I run into my parents room. I'm at their nice end. I'm on the phone and I'm waiting on my mom to get on the phone. And I'm like, did you name her tippy toes? And she's dying laughing. She's like, no, but we named her Tabitha and you can call her tippy toes. Oh, but that sounds so cute together, Tabitha and Tippy toe. Oh my gosh. Oh, that's so cute. Did you have any pets, Dawn? Yeah. You did? One, it was Poochie. Poochie. Cutesy names. Did you ever call your sister Tippy toes? No. Oh. Not that I remember. I was so mad about it. That is so funny. Is it just the two of you? No, I'm the oldest of five kids, so it's me. Oh my gosh. And then my sister. Brother, Tabitha is third, Tip, and then Will, there's five of us, yeah, all two years apart. I'm the oldest of two and Now I have to, and I joke when I talk to my friends who have more kids than me, I'm like, I ran out of arms and now I've got four legged children instead of two legged children, right? One came with a name and it's a name I never would have picked, but it just suited her. So we kept it. The name Beasley was never something that like, I would have ever thought of, but it just suits her. This is fun. These memories. Yeah. There's so much power in a name. I don't know what it is, but I just, I love when my kids would name their stuffed animals or name their toys. And, and I didn't realize. Early on that, you know, everybody has like love languages and my older daughter remembers who gave them what gift or what toy. And me, I'm thinking, you know, you bond with it when you name it or give it a job or give it a role. But there are things that they held on for a very long time because of who gave it to them. So that's, that's the love language of gifts, right? Yeah, it doesn't matter what it is, who it's from and how it's right, right, right. And now that they're like off at college, you know, there's a look, it's a little easier to detach from some of the stuff. It's good to be able to go through things to decide, you know what, what, what could be serving somebody else better. There's a lot of freedom in space and making space. Whenever I went to the manifestation summit, Marie Diamond talks a lot about that. Um, yeah, she's like the feng shui expert, which reminded me. So when we started, um, your, What do you, what are you looking at? Are you facing a door right now? Um, my door is this way, but I have a window in front of me and behind me. Okay, so she says do not face a window and do not face a wall. Face the door. Yes. Facing the door is like inviting to bring. Energy and people in, um, yeah, I'm like, I've always like wished I had a desk that faced out a window, but I understood exactly how she was saying it, you know, and it went onto the whole, like clearing space and energy things out of the way I came home. Um, I found like 300 in a desk drawer from like Reiki clients. That was from last year cleaning out one drawer. That's awesome. I mean, it really works. You're clearing out space to create room for more. And it happens in your energetic body as well as the physical, like being able to see it. There's so much that happens under the surface that you can't really see, but you can feel it. It's so funny you say that because today, the day we're talking about clearing space, um, I just dropped an episode about when to burn your pictures. Or delete and because, you know, pictures can, they're very specific. They're very specific to certain people, and unless it's a historical event, most likely our personal photos are very specific to one or a handful of people, or just a group of people. And, um, I just, I had a really meaningful conversation with somebody who really made me, um, Realize I haven't spoken to that. You know, I talk about like preserving what matters most, but what about the stuff that doesn't matter the most? And there's a lot of healing that comes from clearing stuff that's either a distraction or clutter. Or that actually remind us of pain, not that we want to remove parts of our story that make us who we are, but just by calling it down, you know, like pictures of injuries, you know, I'm thinking about a client right now, who, when her mom passed, um, she, she made these boards for the wake, you know, so as people were visiting, they were looking at pictures, but she, she didn't discern between how would her mom want to be remembered. Her mom's sick end of life. And she literally had some jaundiced pictures of her mom up there, but she didn't have that filter of like, how does my mom want to be remembered? Or how do her loved ones want to remember her instead? She was like, this is the whole sequence of, yeah. And I definitely had a physical response when I saw the boards because there were things were like, my gut just tightened up like, Oh no. Oh, no. I don't have it in my heart as you tell me. Yeah. I think it hurt people to look at those images and I know it was keeping her stuck in her pain. So later on we took the boards and she gave them to me and she had me put them in an album and she said, here's the rest of the ones that didn't go on the board. I'm like, and then she was. I guess, I guess it was a little bit of a delay. She did take a little bit of my guidance about, Hey, do you, do you think your mom really wants to be remembered sick because she's not sick anymore? And what are your thoughts about let's, let's do less and let's make it the best. So it's just really a beautiful tribute of her. You know, you're not throwing her away. By throwing away these pictures of her sick, but you're, but you're allowing yourself to heal because she is healed. She is healed and she appreciated it. And I didn't know at the moment exactly how much she appreciated until weeks later and delivering the album. And a neighbor shows up and she starts talking about what it meant to her to the neighbor in front of me. And I thought, okay, good. Because I knew in my being that what I was doing was rooted in love and delivered with as much love as humanly possible. And she would have said no, if she wasn't okay with what we were doing, because we had this kind of relationship. We knew each other before this. And I trusted her. To be honest with me, but at the same time I was just longing for confirmation. And so it was really, it was very soothing to receive that confirmation. Getting rid of pictures that hurt is kind of the perspective I was. Taking on why we might want to burn some pictures, you know, or delete depending on where they exist. Okay. So let me think about something. Have you seen the new trim? They're bringing the digital camera back. I ended our vacations past week. I had heard about that. And I was like, well, that kind of makes sense. Cause I saw one on my son's room and I was in a hurry leaving, but I noticed it. And I was like, what is, what's the deal with that? And then he's never in his life. Asked me to take a picture of him. Him and his friends were on the beach and he goes, Hey mom, will you take our picture? And I was like, what? And he hands me this little mini red digital camera. And I was like, where did you get this? And he was like, it's Brian's, this girlfriend. She's letting me borrow it for the trip. I was like, Oh my gosh. And then I started noticing, like, I would point it out to Brian every time I'm like, look, they're taking pictures with digital camera. Look. And it was all like, Teenage kids, you know, I love that. I think they're tired of being seen so much. Oh my gosh. Yay for kids knowing something we knew as kids, right? Well, they don't know the film necessarily. I'm wondering though. I haven't asked him yet. I thought, is he going to print them out? Like, what is he doing with them? Because that's part of the fun too. I used to love going to print out pictures. I, in high school, my, I had a whole wall that I just covered and pictures printed out, like just, I would cover, go to the Kodak development place and just print them out. And so always got double prints. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I did that too. And then I've had clients who have like literally 10 or 12 children and guess how many copies of their pictures they would develop. Could you imagine? Literally one for each. Yeah. I remember one client who literally had an entire bedroom of stacks and stacks and stacks of boxes that she literally printed that many times and never distributed. And yeah. Yeah. And all our kids were grown up and out of the house at that point. It's the physical manifestation of what 125, 000 photos in your camera roll can look like. So talk to me more about clearing because that's what you do for a living. Thank you. Yeah, yeah. Often people energetically clear, right? The way I do it, though, is I help people get into a relaxed state. So, when our body goes into relaxation, you're releasing resistance. Um, the body has its own natural ability to do what it's supposed to do. So, whether whatever is ailing you at the time, I may tap into your holding on. To a relationship that's time to pass on, whether it's an emotion, old thing, or, um, one of my favorites is like, when I catch something with the throat chakra, if I'm working on throat and they call for, they start to like fidget right there. Um, it's usually always something that they need to say to someone and they're holding back from saying it. My most recent one was, um, a client came and when her, when she came back for another session, um, she goes, you know, last time I was here, you told me I, I throat stopped and that I wasn't in a communicating what that was with my husband. I was not sharing with him or she was having a lot of spiritual growth. And it was really hard for her to communicate that to him. And, you know, he wasn't, he was saying stuff like, uh, she goes, you know, I came to your dream board workshop and he would pick on me about my dream board. And I, I would just let him say stuff and I wasn't speaking up about it. So since then I've started speaking up and it's, it's caused, you know, um, problems between us where there's a lot of frustration because now I, I have an inner knowing and believing of all this and he's still stuck there. It was like. Well, it's you're you're getting to be his teacher and you just have to remember you're doing all this work. He's not doing any of it He's only gonna get to see from you being an example in the house Don't get so frustrated with him. Just keep shining your light as the example and an understanding that he just doesn't know yet. Yeah. And he'll get to his own. So now that you say that never in his life, does he ever ask for promotion or anything? And recently he was like, I think I'm going to ask for the management position. Like, see, that's you doing your work, shining your light on him and giving him benefits to do more to just in another, like the manly way, right? Dawn, when you're working with a client for somebody who's never experienced the kind of services like you have, like the Reiki and the healing and talking about energy that can seem so obscure for somebody who's just never experienced or done the learning that you have. Can you speak to A beginner has never experienced Reiki. What do you mean by its energy? So like what we started out talking about when we are, know that inner knowing where that hits us in our heart or in our gut, there's these feelings that come up with any, you could have a thought. I'm mad. Where does that energy go in the body? I'm happy. Where does that energy go in the body? You can even direct it. Okay. Right now, make your third eye smile. Don't you feel that it's amazing. So when you come into the intention of a healing session with Reiki, I'm tapping into your energy and I just pick up on things of, I mean, sometimes it is a feeling I got one day I put my hands on someone's knees, her left knee was super hot. I heard, so I get things and I get clairvoyant, clairaudient. So I heard she needs electrolytes. The client drank electrolytes and was like, I've had this arthritis in my knee and now it's gone. I've never had electrolytes before. Interesting. And this was a kid, so it was the mom that I shared the information with for the kid. Mm-Hmm, Um, and so yeah, so that time it was an actual physical feeling. I felt heat in the knee. Heat is a sign of inflammation. And then so like every practitioner is different, but the way, because I am so knowledgeable in the chakra system, I pick up on each chakra as I go up the body. And over time. Like you said, I would question was this message for me. I'm like, no, it's because this session is for them. And sometimes I'm even a little hesitant on sharing information that I picked up. I was like, maybe that was for me and no, I, I'll share it. And there's tears like, oh, my gosh, that's what I needed to hear. Um, and so it is. Energy, but it's me picking up on the person's energy and then me sharing the information for them to heal. And so also because I know ways to heal those certain parts of the body. It's like when your throat's locked up and it's hard to swallow, you're there's two ways. It can be an overactive, which is the person that's. Can not stop talking and no one can get anything in. That's the overactive throat chakra under active is when you're not talking. And so to balance that things you can do is the arm sound chanting. Um, there's certain sound vibrations to the throat. My favorite is lion's breath when you inhale and you open your mouth, hang your tongue out and roll your eyes up to your third eye over and that's releasing that energy that's stuck there. So there's different breathing techniques. There's different the color blue surrounding yourself in the color blue. So those are some of the things. All right, I get. Do you think that's a better understanding? I think that that's a really good peek inside and in a healing session with you, there's a permission that is understood between your subject. And you the practitioner and the way I'm clearing the energy is the Reiki is resetting, helping you relax. And then I, for me as a practitioner, I pull in the crystal bowls and I play the, the sound vibration helps clear the aura as well. I have healing feathers that I sweep the aura with. I have the bells that I sound. So I do a lot of sound healing, which is an energy cleansing as well. On top of using the Reiki too. Beautiful. What about smell? I use oils. I have a box kit from do Tara that is emotional base. And it's, uh, you pick the oil based on the emotion you're wanting, uh, whether it's passion, motivation, peace, Most people pick peace. Uh huh. I always gonna know like they're going to pick peace. Uh huh. So motivation might be for somebody who's feeling like they're just what procrastination kind of stuckness. Yeah. Yeah. The meditation you and I shared before we started riffing today was just so beautiful and resonant and I just felt like there was nothing stuck between us and it was. Yeah. You're in Texas and I'm in New Jersey and I, I literally felt like we were sitting facing each other in the same room. Yeah. That kind of resonance is so beautiful. Do you ever practice distance? When I first started, that's how I started because level one is you learn how to treat yourself and then level two is when you start treating others. So I just kept going to these classes just because I was so into the learning of it and had a girlfriend reach out to me and she was in Louisiana, I was in Texas and she was like, Hey, um, I know you do the Reiki and I've been curious about it. Could you do a session for me? She's going through a really hard time. I'm going through a divorce and it's just like, it was terrible situation. And I was like, okay, sure. So there's many ways you can do it. But I laid out like bolsters and like made a pretend little body and just visualize her and the healing. You can take someone's picture and do the picture. You could use a doll. It could be just any sort of. I mean, you don't even have to use anything. You could use your mind and the other person has to be aware that it's happening and they need to be in a place where they can just be sitting and be calm. And so she was sitting on the couch, watching TV with her children and I'm sending her the Reiki and I were texting back and forth what was happening. I was like, here's what happened through the session. And so one of the things that I saw during her session was like, You know, the dandelions that you blow, I saw her, her body being covered in those. And dandelions are really healing herb, which it's crazy for me. Every time I do a session, I see different things and I learn stuff. Cause I go research like, well, what does this mean? What is it? As I researched, then I learned new things. So I saw her being covered in this and she said, Oh my gosh, while we were. Doing this, her son was watching Thomas the train and he was like, mom, what is that? And it was a dandelion on Thomas the train. I love it. Yeah. And she said she could feel the difference and felt, you know, more relaxed. So yeah, when I, when I've done those, it's crazy. I'll be like, I had anxiety and I don't know after that session. So when you're talking about energy, you're not talking specifically towards physical ailments or emotional ailments. It's all. The same body. Mm hmm. Yeah. So that's, what's so different from say, going to the doctor, cause we'll usually go for one or the other, but it seems like with energy, it's, it's Yeah. Yeah. Cause an injury, a lot of times usually stems from some sort of emotional thing that happened. Like my husband was told by nine doctors, he was having a heart. And so we're in the hospital for a week and my shoulder was so locked up in my right ear. So I'm going to the doctor trying to figure out what's going on with my shoulders and pain can never get rid of the pain. I mean, I'm doing everything, chiropractor, all these different things. I do this meditation. It said, relax your shoulders. The amount of pain that I released just from being told to relax my shoulders, I, I couldn't even my chiropractor goes, don't tell anybody that I'm going to lose clients. Sometimes we just need somebody else, the voice of another person to guide us through that intention, because telling yourself to just relax your shoulders and actually being guided through it. Are definitely, I mean, there's benefit to being able to guide yourself through practice, but the benefit of actually having an expert lead you through something, I feel like it's maybe more effective in many cases. So it starts with the breath and the breath starts to relax the nervous system and the mind, and then you can start to relax the body. Now that I'm conscious of it, all the times when I felt my worst or when I'm stressed or when I make really big mistakes, it's because I was holding my breath. Yes. I don't know where I learned that, but I had terrible stage fright as a child when I was discovering that music was really what lit me up. Like I love creating crafty things, but music was really where I felt safe in school. Probably the only place I felt safe as a, as a child in school was in music class. And yet being on stage and the kids that I did not feel safe around staring at me. Shut that down. And I really, I really struggled with stage fright. And if I knew the first thing about breathwork back then, I probably would have grown up totally differently. Yeah. Cause I carried that through being a music major in college and there were auditions. I did not, I did not even give myself a chance to experience because my stage fright was so bad. And I had teachers who just did not know compassion. They didn't, they were very skilled musicians. They were very good, good teachers for the right student who just didn't need any emotional support, but I clearly needed some emotional support. Mm hmm. And, and it wasn't until I was actually a teacher, a music school teacher that I actually found my voice and I breathed out of necessity. I was responsible for these students. And so I learned how to make a safe place where I was very proud of myself. I'd have fifth grade boys stand up and sing a solo in front of class and not be afraid. Oh yeah. Uh, so that was, that was, I think the single thing that I'm proudest of my education days is. Is that I was able to create the safe space that as a child, I didn't have, or didn't feel like I had, I should say how we perceive things is our reality, right? I love that. I know it now. And, and the funny thing is what I love for my performing daughters to do some breathwork with me, sure, but I'm just going to do me. And let them benefit from that because, you know, telling a young adult and a teenager to do what I do is just, they have to come to things in their own time in their own way and they don't have the same scars. I do. Thank God. Well, we all have our own though. That's for sure. But anyway, and, and, and, you know, Dawn, I think that podcasting is one of the ways. Where I can see my throat chakra healing because I think everybody in their own way needs to be able to express what they know. And part of that's being seen or being heard or being acknowledged or reciprocated. And podcasting has, has offered me, um, a very satisfying dose of all of that. Yeah. Yeah. It said that definitely like activated, um, mine to another level. And then also going live and doing the reels, all those things. It's like. For me, it's more what I've realized it's a be seen thing. And I did some inner child healing meditations that helped me figure out why and some blockages, which was really cool. You know, it took me back to, should I share that story? I've shared it with you before. I would love for you to share it on record. I, you know, the question was, when is the first time you ever really remember being like emotionally, like hurt? I can't, I can't remember the question, but cause it was working on inner child healing. So it dropped me back into time and kindergarten. I was sent to school for, it was Halloween. My mom dressed me up like as a clown and I go out to recess. And it felt like thousands of people create a big circle around me, pointing and laughing. I am just bawling, crying. There's this angel, blonde hair, blue eyed girl that comes and runs through the crowd and grabs my hand and points at everyone. Stop laughing at her. She pulls me out of the crowd, which is one year older than me, Rebecca, I'll never forget her. And she pulls me over to my teacher. And then I'd stand there with my teacher, just bawling and they call my mom to come get me. And, um, and, and then it has you, like, go through the whole experience, pulls you out, you tap back into right now, come back into your body now, and then you go back into the timeline and you say, okay, what could you have done differently? And when I asked myself that I started doing cartwheels and laughing with them, and it was a way to, like. Apply that now, right releasing that old stuff because we were going to carry that with us and that was just one of the things and got to like, unlock all those old things that, you know, where you felt that way and you felt embarrassed. So, yeah, doing that helped me a lot because it made me aware of some of the wise of being embarrassed to show up. Right stuff stuck in your body. Curious. Do you have a picture of yourself dressed as a clown? I wish I did because I would just, I'm, I'm, I'm just imagining if I were you today with what I know, I would love to see that picture of myself and just say, you're so cute. You know what I mean? Yeah. You are so funny in the best way, you know, the best smile. And, and I've heard people. Talk about healing their inner child and until you really actually do it. It just, it sounds like a thing other people do. Yeah. I started hearing about it like, what is this? I want to do that. And so I started researching trying to find. Yeah. To do it. And I've, I've only done it through finding meditations. I haven't actually gone to someone to do it in person or anything. But I think we can all do it for ourselves by going back to a memory, like the clown costume moment. I mean, cause I remember I've been this height since fifth grade and that is freakishly tall for a fifth grader to be. How tall are you? Almost five eight. Okay. And, um, maybe if I, you know, stood straight or longer, I'd be five eight legit, but that's really tall for a fifth grader. I was teased and blah, blah, blah, blah. You know, everybody's been bullied one way or another. But. I really believed I was the ugly duckling that would always be the ugly duckling. And when I had Nora DeAngelis come up on the bus and tell me to come sit in the back with her, cause that's where the cool kids sat. And she was a year younger than me. I thought, is she talking to me? And I found like the best friend of my childhood that way. No, she picked me and I felt so seen and I felt so valid and I will forever be her. Remember her as that little angel that pulled you out of the circle. She was my school bus angel because riding the school bus was no happier than I won't let my kids around the school. These are all really, really great things because like I said, we can, we can all relive a memory memory and then ask ourselves, well, what if. What if we wrote a new ending for that? Or what if we told ourselves, you are so cute. You are so smart. Mm hmm. So what if you don't do it like them? You're not them. You're you, you know, and every day provides us an opportunity to just love on our little self. Yeah, it reminds me to the Whitney Houston documentary. Have you watched that? I mean, parents called her the American princess her whole life. Like they instilled in her, like who she was, right. It was a reminder to me, like those positive affirmations from the people around you, especially the most important people, um, impactful they can be. They really are. She was my superhero. I idolized Whitney Houston. She was part of the strength in my piece and music. For sure. Yeah. And there were times where the fantasies of being as confident as she alluded to be really helped me breathe as little as I was. Yeah. It would have been worse. It would have been worse without some pipes like Whitney to listen to and wail with. You were practicing embodying her. Yeah. I just want to say, Dawn, thank you for being a safe space for me. And I know that. You create a safe space for so many other people, not just your own family. And I applaud your work and I'm, I'm very proud of you and grateful to call you my friend. Thank you. Well, the same way about you. Thank you so much.